I am excited to be participating with some other bloggers and book lovers in a virtual book club this month! When I first saw Steph’s post about doing a virtual book club, I was intrigued. This winter we made some winter fun with a once-a-month book club that turned out to be even more fun that I imagined! Since this book was conveniently sitting on the shelf at my library, I decided to snatch it up and join in, and I am so glad that I did!
When I read about the book: Cleaning House: a Mom’s 12 Month Experiment to Rid Her Home of Youth Entitlement by Kay Wills Wyma, I had two reactions….
#1: “Wow, I am doing pretty well! My fourteen year old son can cook several meals, solo. Both he and my 11 yr old daughter can successfully do laundry. Everyone can vacuum and clean bathrooms (more or less).”
#2: “Wow… why are my kids no longer consistently doing the things I trained them to do? How did I buy back into the ‘it’s just easier to do it myself’ mentality?”
I am halfway through the book now, and whether our kids do very little around the house, or do a lot, this book is a good way to check-in with ourselves, on how we are doing with our goal of raising self-sufficient citizens, who understand the value of a job done well, and that life isn’t going to be handed to them on a silver platter.
Kay talks about changing from communicating “I love you, so let me make life easy for you,” to “I love you. I believe in you. I know what you’re capable of. So I’m going to make you work.” She shares some startling statistics about how the “self esteem” movement in our schools has left us with generations of kids who are far more narcissistic than previous generations. And she quotes a professor of psychology at San Diego State University, who wrote about the “ever-rising rate of depression among young people, despite elevated views of themselves.” These kids are having a harder time transitioning into adult life. (Many are living at home longer and longer).
I found it very valuable to take the time to ponder my own thought-processes and decision-making, regarding having my kids work more. There are a few things they know they are counted on to do. But I have definitely found myself slipping into the “it’s easier to do it myself” state of mind, either because I don’t want to deal with the complaints and groans, or I want it done to my standards etc.
Well, enough for now! The first posts for conversation as we go through the book a few chapters at a time (you don’t have to blog, to participate!) will begin on Thursday the 18th! Hope you can join us!